Hilarious Headlines
(from Orange Boy strikes again! - 02 February 2001)
from a daily down-under!
Todays entertainment comes from my favourite source, the tabloid headlinewriters. These are the 25 "best" headlines from the Australia version of The
Sun, last
year:
1. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Experts Say
2. Include Your Children When Baking Cookies
3. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
4. Drunks Get Nine Months in Violin Case
5. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
6. Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
7. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
8. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
9. British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
10. Teacher Strike Idles Kids
11. Clinton Wins Budget; More Lies Ahead
12. Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told
13. Miners Refuse to Work After Death
14. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
15. Stolen Painting Found by Tree
16. Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
17. War Dims Hope for Peace
18. If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While
19. Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
20. Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge
21. New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
22. Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Space
23. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
24. Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter
25. Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
And who could forget these classics...........
Grandmother of Eight Makes Hole in One.
Deaf Mute Gets New Hearing in Killing.
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers.
House Passes Gas Tax on to Senate.
Stiff Opposition Expected to Casketless Funeral Plan.
Two Convicts Evade Noose, Jury Hung.
William Kelly was Fed Secretary.
Milk Drinkers are Turning to Powder.
Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should be Belted.
Quarter of a Million Chinese Live on Water.
Farmer Bill Dies in House.
They just keep on coming........
Marijuana Issue Sent To Joint Committee
Messiah Climaxes In Chorus Of Hallelujahs
Married Priests In Catholic Church A Long Time Coming
Governor Chiles Offers Rare Opportunity To Goose Hunters
Would She Climb To The Top Of Mr. Everest Again? Absolutely!
Thanks To President Clinton, Staff Sgt. Fruer Now Has A Son
Clinton Places Dickey In Gore's Hands
Starr Aghast At First Lady Sex Position
Clinton Stiff On Withdrawal
Organ Festival Ends In Smashing Climax
Textron Inc. Makes Offer To Screw Company Stockholders
Lawyer Says Client Is Not That Guilty.
Alzheimer's Center Prepares For An Affair To Remember
Legislator Wants Tougher Death Penalty Find other Odds and ends articles
Comments
-
Stafon: Reading this makes my decisions easier than taknig candy from a baby.(22/10/2011)
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Loose Moose: Very funny.. and witty..
(20/02/2007)
